Coming undone at the seams

I once had a new wife tell me she needed my help bc she was sooooo overwhelmed. What’s the problem you ask? You should be there to help your fellow military spouse while hubs is deployed Ayme. Well before you throw stones at me let me add the following. I at the time had a newborn, actually he was like 4 months old, and 2 other boys under the age of 5. SHE was a stay at home wife. No outside job. She had someone that came and cleaned her house. Not kidding she didn’t own a vacuum or a swifter! She had no pets. And the neighborhood literally did her lawn and took out her trash cans for her. Brought her dinners, took her out and looked in on her. I didn’t know what to say. Honestly her “overwhelmed” statement left me speachless. I have done 2 deployments in this house. Both deployments I was pregnant, one of those I delivered. No-one even OFFERED to make me dinner. I was never overwhelmed (maybe it was bc I was so tired from surviving). My point is, be aware of other people around you and what they are going through. Don’t solicit sympathy. It takes a lot to ask for help but be careful how you ask. I honestly could have empathized with her if she hadn’t acted like she was the first person on the planet to deal with a deployed husband. I would have been more helpful if I wasn’t so nauseated by all the volunteers to aide this poor helpless creature. At the end of the day she can do her and I will do me. I guess that I should be happy that I am not seen as this frail flower that needs someone next to me every step of the way but rather as a fiercely independent WOMAN who can hold her shit together at all times! Yeah, I am going with THAT!